Boy parents: the work you’re doing now is changing the world, this is how

Caution: Trigger Warning. Themes of suicide.

On today’s episode of the Cold Coffee, Hot Mess podcast, Nadean and Olivia spoke to Ricky Russo, a guidance counselor in Sydney boys’ schools for over 30 years.

With a boy each to raise, the girls were particularly interested in the things they could do to raise good men, men that would improve the state of the world, be able to show kindness, resilience and be in touch with their emotions.

Ricky spoke at length about communication, and how to use trust as a foundation to encourage communication. He delivered hacks in the form of ways to effectively do this, and also touched on the importance of family values and the necessity for male role models they can look to.

Robyn and her son Hugo

The vast difference between our children’s generation and our own, is most probably the availability of the father figure. Ricky described a direct correlation between boys who have a father around a lot of the time, and those without a strong male role model. He outlined the link as heavily dependent on the family situation, as most of the boys he speaks to will have factors going on outside of school, such as in the home, that lead to the issues they’re experiencing.

Ricky also touched on the rise in mental health issues and anxiety that he comes across from his students. 

This is by no means a new problem, but we have a new level of insight that past generations just didn’t have, which means we can identify these issues sooner, and use the correct tools to provide help and support.

Boys these days are encouraged to cry, to air their grievances, to voice their worries, and it’s these things - that may not seem all that important - that is actually helping to change the world.

How, you ask?

Manori and her son Remy

With parents now more aware of the importance of a present and supportive family environment, and better armed with tactics to provoke communication, what we’re effectively doing is ensuring the future generation of men are more in touch with their emotions and feelings, and better prepared to face adversity. Simply said, they are longer encouraged to just ‘hold it in’, until they can no longer do that, and choose a path of violence or self harm.

If we can continue to do the parenting ground work now, in taking the steps to raise good men, who knows what could happen? Perhaps domestic violence will longer being the second biggest killer of women in Australia. Perhaps suicide will no longer be one of the leading causes of death in men aged 15-44.

The sky is the limit. Let’s keep up the good work, boy parents.

You can listen to the whole episode of the ‘Cold Coffee, Hot Mess Podcast’ right here.